I’ve never been able to keep a plant alive. Houseplants are given a death sentence when I bring them home. But when Allie gave me a handpainted pot with flowering plant for Mother’s Day, I decided to do all I could to keep this little thing alive. I watered it regularly, carried it gently to the porch mornings, then back in again later in the day so it wouldn’t get burnt to a crisp in the afternoon sun. I set it in the kitchen near the window. It was happy. Weeks go by and this little gift is growing and strong. New leaves sprouted and it doubled in size. I was happy. Then today, I go to get my little potted plant to water it and move it to the porch for the morning, and find someone had pulled all of the leaves and stems from it. There they lay, piled in the pot, limp and dying. All that was left was a stub poking sadly out of the soil. And 6 young people in this house all said it wasn’t them that did it. How often do I hear “Not Me”…I won’t even begin to try to get across how frustrating that is. But with this we go to a moral and ethical base. Why? Why take something I have worked so hard on, that meant something to me, and to Allie, and purposefully ruin it? With no other reason than to hurt me? No other reason than to undermine something I have cared for and enjoyed. When I write about my family, you’ll see extremes. Extreme happiness and satisfaction and successes. But also extreme failures, and extreme pain. There seems to be no middle ground when it comes to families. Is it more pronounced because we are a blended family? I laugh at that phrase - “Blended Family”. There are days there is absolutely no “blending” at all. It’s “Us” versus “Them”. From both sides. Things like this, and many more instances of action beyond reason, that make me wonder - how am I to bond to these people? How am I to grow to love them? I care for them, I provide for them, I will protect them and lead them and teach them. Prepare them for adulthood as best I can. But then these actions devastate me. They are half-grown. These are not infants we are taking about. I am beyond the time of their lives that I can form a firm foundation of values and morals and right actions. But I am expected to be a parent to them. How can you parent people who hate you in such a fundamental way as to pull the leaves off a little plant in a handpainted pot just to hurt you?